Client Engagement Videos

Judith E. Glaser and Benchmark Communications frequently write for and are featured in blogs and podcasts by major media outlets like Entrepreneur, Harvard Business Review, The Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, as well as other specialty sites in the conversational and leadership arenas and other voices throughout the world.

We all go through our own version of an identity crisis at least once in our life. We ask ourselves, “Should I be a doctor, teacher, entrepreneur or CEO of some global company?” We all want to know where we fit into the world, and where we can make our best contribution.

Facebook’s founder Mark Zuckerberg gave powerful advice when he said, “Move fast and break things. Unless you are breaking stuff, you are not moving fast enough.”

For a period of time, Deborah was a psychologist for the Dr. Phil Show. What an awesome opportunity to experiment and research relationships gone awry.

She remembers only too well coaching two show’s guests – Tammy and Reynir – and how this changed their lives of.  Dr. Phil would send people he interviewed on the show to HeartMath for help.  Tammy and Reynir were on the edge of divorce. On the show they were constantly reacting to each other and arguing hatefully. Dr. Phil told them they should divorce if they couldn’t change with the help he was going to give them. HeartMath changed the course of their lives, and enabled them to rediscover the love they had when they first met.

We live in a world of moving targets.Once we get into routines we feel comfortable, and from comfort comes confidence. Yet in a world of moving targets, we need to be open to change.

Great leaders identify, measure, recognize, and reward meaningful efforts and achievements—and celebrate often with the people involved. Why should managers and leaders celebrate more? Creating a feeling of celebration helps meet people’s needs for inclusion, innovation, appreciation, and collaboration – and now with the advances in neuroscience – we know that celebration elevates oxytocin, which is a neurotransmitter which elevates collaboration and bonding. In fact when we enjoy and celebrate with others we produce these happy hormones – which is the best Conversational Cocktail to elevate spirits for the New Year!

Great leaders identify, measure, recognize, and reward meaningful efforts and achievements—and celebrate often with the people involved. Why should managers and leaders celebrate more? Creating a feeling of celebration helps meet people’s needs for inclusion, innovation, appreciation, and collaboration – and now with the advances in neuroscience – we know that celebration elevates oxytocin, which is a neurotransmitter which elevates collaboration and bonding. In fact when we enjoy and celebrate with others we produce these happy hormones – which is the best Conversational Cocktail to elevate spirits for the New Year!

The key is to use your conversational intelligence (C-IQ)—your capacity to connect—to recognize social and psychological needs and translate this awareness into conversations that meet these needs. Here are five steps you can take now:

According to social science research conducted by Brian Uzzi, professor of leadership and organizational change at the Kellogg School of Management, most people choose friends and colleagues based on three principles that even they may not be aware of. Most people, according to the research, choose people strategically based on these decisions...

Are Your I-Centric Habit Patterns Getting the Best of You?

We live in a world of moving targets. Once we get into routines we feel comfortable, and from comfort comes confidence. Yet in a world of moving targets, we need to be open to change.

On June 30, 2015, The Luxury Marketing Council of Connecticut-Hudson Valley CEO Roundtable Luncheon was took place at the Ritz Carlton in Westchester, New York. The event was led by Katherine Minckler, founder and chairman of The Luxury Marketing Council and Judith E. Glaser, CEO of Benchmark Communications.

At the event a line-up of great entrepreneurs were asked about their big breakthrough in business success...

Developing an awareness of how others see you is one of the hardest but also most important things you can do. Here's how.

Whether you're leading 2 or 2000 people I can assure you of one immutable truth about leadership that you need to always keep in mind; all eyes are upon you.

Staying away from compromise is the key to getting the most out of a negotiation.

Negotiation may well be the single most important and yet least understood business and life skill. Most people see negotiation as a conflict between adversaries, a way to one-up an opponent through manipulation. With over 30 years of running businesses, I can tell you that nothing could be further from the truth. Negotiation is not a boxing match; it's more like a dance between strangers in which the participants need to develop a deep understanding of each other to avoid tripping over themselves.

This second blog in the series provides an integrative look at the work of Judith E. Glaser based on her book, Conversational Intelligence. What might be of interest is that both Liz Wiseman and Judith E. Glaser seem to know or know of the Enneagram because when I met them at the Hudson Institute Learning Conference and was introduced to them via being about the Enneagram in business applications, Liz told me her type, whereas Judith gave an affirmative nod of recognition.

Are your people afraid?

I’m not asking if you are a bully or a bad boss, or about the fear about being punished for a well-thought-out plan or product launch that fails. I’m talking about something more visceral: anxiety caused by the concern that something drastic — layoff, firing, pay cut or demotion—will happen.

Many of us act as though we all see the same reality, yet the truth is we don’t. Human beings have cognitive biases, or blind spots. Blind spots are ways our mind becomes blocked from seeing reality as it is — blinding us from seeing the real truth about ourselves in relation to others. Once we form a conclusion, we become blind to alternatives, even if they are right in front of their eyes.
Social psychologist Emily Pronin, along with colleagues Daniel Lin and Lee Ross at Princeton University’s Department of Psychology, created the term “bias blind spots,” named after the visual blind spot.

Three decades ago I began my first experiment in Conversational Intelligence, I was hired by Union Carbide to work with 17 high-powered sales executives in danger of losing a bid for a key contract. My job was to figure out how they could raise their game and beat the other seven competitors.

For two weeks I had them role-play potential conversations with “customers” and charted what they said. The patterns were clear: The executives used “telling statements” 85% of the time, leaving only 15% for questions. And almost all the questions they asked were actually statements in disguise. They were talking and talking, trying to bring their counterparts around to their point of view—all the time thinking that they were still conducting good, productive conversations.

To create change, courageous leaders jump in and embrace the process as an opportunity. They also create the space for open communication and collaboration with their teams.  In the previous three steps, you learned to recognize and release old baggage filled with toxic experiences that negatively undermine and denigrate relationships, and replace them with new meanings that positively uplift and inspire relationships — empowering a new sense of optimism and effectiveness.

The more we talk about change, the more we talk about all the problems and challenges that can emerge – resulting in negative mindsets which trigger “fear hormones” and “threat networks” in our brains. No wonder change is so difficult. 

stada.org.sg by Judith E. Glaser| June 20, 2014

Trust is Absent

Both relationships and results always suffer.

A decade ago, I had a coaching client, Jack, who had been hired as the new president of a global publishing company, poised to transform its offerings from print to digital. Some even saw Jack as the next CEO. However, when Jack interacted with me, he came across as a tough, arrogant executive who lived inside his head and didn’t share his feelings. In retrospect, I know we were caught in our biases about each other, trapped in a dance of distrust.

stada.org.sg by Judith E. Glaser | August 8, 2014

Addicted to being rightI’m sure it’s happened to you: You’re in a tense team meeting trying to defend your position on a big project and start to feel yourself losing ground. Your voice gets louder. You talk over one of your colleagues and correct his point of view. He pushes back, so you go into overdrive to convince everyone you’re right. It feels like an out of body experience – and in many ways it is.  In terms of its neurochemistry, your brain has been hijacked.

forwardmetrics.com and c-suitenetwork.com by Judith E. Glaser | July 31, 2014

Say What You Mean, Mean What You SayOur least developed skill is the ability to confront each other face to face, say what is in our hearts and minds, and at the same time build and strengthen our relationships. Confrontation is something we tend to avoid.

Having difficult conversations scares most people into thinking they will lose a friendship, and so they avoid the truth. When we feel frustrated or angry at someone who we feel has undermined us, we get so upset we just can't find the words to express ourselves. We end up pushing, not pulling, expressing our worst behaviors, or we may hold it all inside until we boil up and explode.

successtelevision.biz by Judith E. Glaser | August 5, 2014

fear-of-conflict Confrontation is something we tend to avoid. It’s our least developed skill; the ability to confront each other face to face, say what is in our hearts and minds, and at the same time build and strengthen our relationships.

successtelevision.biz by Judith E. Glaser | August 12, 2014

traffic light The consequences of your interactions are filed daily in your memory bank, either as “feel good” or “feel bad” experiences. Memories with strong emotions linger, since the brain more easily files and calls up memories attached with strong sensory data. Smells, tastes, and emotions attached to a memory give it distinctions that enable you to call it up more easily. With little provocation, we can instantly call up a bad experience.

quality-conversationsvistage.com  by Judith E. Glaser | May 6, 2014

What if you could create an organization where change and transformation were exhilarating and natural? Where people were devoted, engaged, and accountable to act as leaders rather than blind followers? Where people worked with each other to differentiate their brand and capture the hearts, minds, and souls of customers?

We are all familiar with the “chemistry” factor in relationships and the chemical attraction metaphor; now we are learning that such insights are more than metaphor— they are reality!

site.successtelevision.biz  | January 8, 2014

CI-Glaser-book-3D-233

…Or, how to reframe and get neutral in highly charged emotional situations.

In fact, Conversational Intelligence is a three skills when you thinking you’re learning one…kind of book Judith E. Glaser, a frequent blogger here, wrote the book so leaders can become better communicators. After all, great communicators can rally the troops and make change and innovation happen or turn around a business’ performance.

lucidplot.com by  Jonathan Kahn | May 12, 2014

jonathanIn Episode 23 of the Together London Podcast, I talk to Judith Glaser and Whitney Johnson about collaboration, listening, and finding meaning in our work. You can follow them on twitter @CreatingWE and @johnsonwhitney.

To learn more about these themes, come to #dareconf: people skills for digital workers, 22-23 September 2014 in London.

Hit a wall? So many ambitious and talented leaders plateau and even regress once they “reach the top” of the ladder, mountain or organizational structure they’ve been climbing. There’s a simple reason this can happen, and it sometimes come down to conversation.

ideaslaboratory.com by Doug Williams | June 23, 2014

glaser-innovation-excellence-panel'Not-invented-here' syndrome is a rallying call for some who cling to the notion that innovation must come from within the company to have any value.
...
At an Innovation Excellence hosted panel discussion earlier this year, Judith Glaser, CEO and founder of Benchmark Communications, made the point that human beings need to change the brain to accept a new way of looking at the world.

forwardmetrics.com by Judith E. Glaser | July 9, 2014

brainstorm-teamYou’re sitting in a meeting with your team brainstorming about the financial crisis, and what to do about it. Business is awful. People have stopped buying your products. Market share has plummeted. Everyone is scared and emotional. Some people express anger; others close down.

stada.org.sg by Judith E. Glaser | July 1, 2014

trust-fearBoth relationships and results always suffer.
A decade ago, I had a coaching client, Jack, who had been hired as the new president of a global publishing company, poised to transform its offerings from print to digital. Some even saw Jack as the next CEO. However, when Jack interacted with me, he came across as a tough, arrogant executive who lived inside his head and didn’t share his feelings. In retrospect, I know we were caught in our biases about each other, trapped in a dance of distrust.

qualtrics.com by Judith E. Glaser | July 2, 2014

qualtrics-thumbsRecently, my consultancy, The CreatingWE Institute, partnered with Qualtrics to analyze the frequency of negative versus positive interactions in today’s workplaces. The results were published in Harvard Business Review.

economictimes.indiatimes.com by Judith E. Glaser | June 21, 2014

inspire-positivityWhy do negative comments and conversations stick with us longer than positive ones? Chemistry plays a big role. When we face criticism, rejection or fear, our bodies produce higher levels of cortisol, a hormone that shuts down the thinking center of our brains and activates conflict aversion and protection behaviours. We become more reactive and sensitive, perceive greater judgement and negativity than exists.

forwardmetrics.com by Judith E. Glaser | May 19, 2014

navigational-listeningFOR A LEADER, navigational listening is the most powerful tool for gathering information, for influencing others and for creating transformation; perhaps, at times, more powerful than speaking.

blog.c-suitenetwork.com by Judith E. Glaser | May 23, 2014

navigational-listeningFor a leader, listening is perhaps the most important component of communication. It’s essential for moving ideas from one person to another. Done well, it will enable you to collect information for timely and effective decision-making. The listening adult’s mind is never blank or completely impartial. Our listening is influenced by events, relationships and experiences — all adding to what we hear and its meaning. As objective as we would like to think we are when we listen, we actually are not.

vistage.com by Judith E. Glaser | May 8, 2014

listeningFor a manager, listening is perhaps the most important component of communication. It’s essential to move ideas from one person to another. Done well, it will enable you to collect information for timely and effective decision-making.

dralvin.net by Dr. Alvin and Judith E. Glaser | May 4, 2014

dr-alvinOne of the more famous lines from movies is the one uttered by the punitive prison warden (Strother Martin) to a recalcitrant escaped convict (Paul Newman) in the 1967 motion picture Cool Hand Luke: “What we have here is a failure to communicate.”

commpro.biz by Judith E. Glaser | April 30, 2014

the-i-in-teamOne of the more famous lines from movies is the one uttered by the punitive prison warden (Strother Martin) to a recalcitrant escaped convict (Paul Newman) in the 1967 motion picture Cool Hand Luke: “What we have here is a failure to communicate.”

theglasshammer.com by Kayla Turo | April 30, 2014

women-rolesInnovation is the buzzword of buzzwords right now.

Everybody is innovating, or wants to be innovating, or tweeting about how they should be innovating, or Instagraming a picture of the innovative culinary concoction they had for breakfast. We are rethinking how we do what we do and who we are. And we are all sort of obsessed with the process.

strategy-business.com by Theodore Kinno | May 14, 2014

Theodore-KinniI have no idea who first snapped off the classic putdown, “What part of no don’t you understand?” It’s not Shakespeare, but the sentiment is timeless.

3 effective communication skills to manage conflictsuccesstelevision.biz by Judith E. Glaser | March 9, 2013

I’m sure this has happened to you: You’re in a tense team meeting trying to defend your position on a big project and start to feel yourself losing ground. Your voice gets louder. You talk over one of your colleagues and correct his point of view. He pushes back, so you go into overdrive to convince everyone you’re right. It feels like an out-of-body experience — and in many ways it is. In terms of its neurochemistry, your brain has been hijacked.

www.commpro.biz by Judith E. Glaser | February 5, 2014

ConnectingI have great respect for professionals who work in business and marketing communications (Mar-Com)—including advertising, investor relations and public relations—because you tend to hit the mark more often with your messages, a consequence of being more focused on the receiver than the sender.

 

site.successtelevision.biz by Judith E. Glaser | March 27, 2014

woman-mapWhen driving to a new location, we often stop at a gas station to ask for directions, use our GPS or a handy paper map to navigate unfamiliar territory. If we get lost, we need only refer back to the map to find our way.

 

site.successtelevision.biz by Judith E. Glaser | March 25, 2014

Explaining and ListeningTry to recall a recent situation when you were a listener. It may have been a speech delivered by an executive, a discussion with a subordinate or an explanation from a peer.

Did you listen to facts or to specific words?

workreimagined.aarp.org by Larry Dobrow | February 19, 2014

DiversityThe tinier the company, the tougher it is, but doing the right thing can win customers and hit your bottom line.

womenandco.com by Mercedes Cardona, OMH Communications | March 3, 2014

bigstock-In-Computer-Classroom-3911085Mentoring programs have gained traction at workplaces large and small, and with good reason: A good mentor can provide valuable advice, offer encouragement and celebrate your accomplishments as you progress along your career path. But what if you’re already halfway through your professional journey? You may already have a lot of advice to give—but chances are, you still have a lot to learn.

fastcompany.com by Drake Baer | January 7, 2014

grahambones-250You might already know that your emotional intelligence can influence your job success. But what about your callously oblivious boss or your ambiguously rigid colleagues?

leadershipcafe.com by Tal Shnall | February 27, 2013

difficult-conversationsJudith E. Glaser (@CreatingWE) and Lori Polachek (@LPolachek1offer advice to business leaders at a fork in the road.

kornferryinstitute.com by Judith E. Glaser | February 28, 2014

top-5-mistakesThe corporate battlefields are littered with the burnt-out, rusting hulks of auspicious strategies that failed in spectacular fashion and companies that - despite having novel and promising ideas - constantly trail their peers in profits and shareholder returns.

Five mistakes that lower your CI-Q: Ignoring Other Perspectives, Fixation on "Being Right", Tell-Sell-Yell, Allowing Emotions to Affect Listening, Disengaged Listeners.

Subcategories

Glaser-Harvard-Business-Review

Judith E. Glaser has joined other business bloggers at Harvard Business Review to discuss a variety of business topics including managing people, innovation, leadership, and more.

huffington-post-logo

Judith E. Glaser brings her leadership expertise to this prolific destination for news, blogs and original content offering coverage of US politics, entertainment, style, world news, technology and comedy.

entrepreneur-logo

No matter what the path, the entrepreneurial journey always begins with a mindset. That's why Entrepreneur delivers distinctive content on every road taken by the independent thinkers, builders and leaders driving economies across the world. Judith E. Glaser joins other thought leaders to discuss, enhance and develop the entrepreneurial journey through Conversational Intelligence.

Psychology-Today

Commentary, Research and News that cover all aspects of Human Behavior, from the workings of the brain, to relationships and the larger cultural forces that influence our decisions.

Leadership-Excellence-Award-2014

Month after month, the foremost minds on management and leadership share their dynamic high-quality leadership content. Excellence Essentials consists of three publications: Leadership Excellence, Personal Excellence and Sales and Service Excellence. By constantly publishing the best ideas from experienced consultants, trainers, and business leaders, the magazines are shaping organizations throughout the world. Below are issues featuring articles by and awards for Judith E. Glaser.


Judith E. Glaser
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