A seemingly simple act such as talking with a colleague—a small momentary exchange of words in a hallway—has the ability to alter someone’s life permanently. Phrases like “I can’t do that!” and “If I only knew how!” may take only seconds to utter, but they can be life changing. There is little connection between the time it takes to say the words and the impact they may have on a person, a relationship, or an organization.

Conversations have the ability to trigger emotional reactions. Words carry baggage. They are rarely neutral. Words carry a history of years of use. Each time another experience overlays another meaning and it all gets collected somewhere in our brain—the vault—it’s there, ready to be activated during conversations.

Conversations carry meaning that becomes more embedded in the listener than the speaker. We communicate with each other through conversations; we connect to others through conversations. Once the umbilical cord is cut, conversations are the connectivity that keeps us all together. However, words are not external, objective reality. They are projections of our own inner reality.

Language is instinctual. It is also utilitarian. All animals use language to communicate, and most of all to signal each other about how to explore, navigate, and survive the environments in which they live.

Conversational Intelligence™ is the intelligence hardwired into every human being to enable us to navigate successfully with others. Through language and conversations we learn to build trust, to bond, to grow, and build partnerships with each other to create and transform our societies. There is no more powerful skill hardwired into every human being than the wisdom of conversations.

Everything happens through conversations. Conversations carry meaning—and meaning is embedded in the listener even more than in the speaker. We communicate with each other through conversations. Conversations have the ability to trigger emotional reactions. The words we use in our conversations are rarely neutral. Words have histories informed by years of use. Each time another experience overlays another meaning it all gets collected somewhere in our brain to be activated during conversations. Understanding how we project meaning into our conversations will enable us to connect with others and, in so doing, let go of much of the self-talk that diverts us from Creating WE.